11 layers

LAYER ONE: ON THE OUTSIDE

Name: Cynthia Denise
birthday: May 3, 1980
Current Location: work
Eye Color: hazel green
Hair Color: dark brown
Righty or Lefty: Righty
Zodiac Sign: Taurus

LAYER TWO: ON THE INSIDE

Your fears: heights and escalators
Your perfect pizza: lots of meat, jalapeno peppers, and extra cheese
Goal for future: to be successful at my career and to be happy with the one I love

LAYER THREE: YESTERDAY, TODAY, TOMORROW:

Your thoughts first waking up: hmm. . . work out or snooze button? Yeah, I think I'll hit the snooze.
Your best physical feature: I'm going to say. . . breasts.
Your bedtime: sometime around midnight or so
Your most missed memory: weekends with my grandparents

LAYER FOUR: YOUR PICK:

Pepsi or Coke: I'm off caffeine, but if I was still on it, I would actually choose Mountain Dew
McDld's or Burger King: McDonald's
Single or group dates: single
Adidas or Nike: Nike
Lipton Tea or NesteA: no preference
Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate
Cappuccino or coffee: Again, I'm off caffeine, but given the choice, cappuccino all the way

LAYER FIVE: DO YOU?

Smoke: no
Take a shower: Everyday
Think you've been in love: I am now
Believe in yourself: Eh, on my good days

LAYER SIX: IN THE PAST MONTH

Drank alcohol: yep
Gone to the mall: yes
Been on stage: no
Eaten Sushi: no
Been dumped: no, thank goodness
Gone skating: nope
Dyed your hair: no

LAYER SEVEN: HAVE YOU EVER:

Played a stripping game: yes, strip poker
Gotten beaten up: nope
Changed who you were to fit in: yes, occasionally. I'm a big pushover

LAYER EIGHT: GETTING OLD:

Age you're hoping to be married: I don't have a deadline. When it happens, it happens. I am with the person that I'm hoping to spend the rest of my life with so it will happen eventually.

LAYER NINE: IN A GIRL/GUY

Best eye color: don't care as long as they're focused on me
Best hair color: doesn't matter
Clothing style: doesn't matter

LAYER TEN: TIME

1 MINUTE AGO: 9:08 am
1 HOUR AGO: surfing the web at work
1 DAY AGO: the 28th: cleaning my apartment in preparation of Boy Wonder coming over to my place tonight
1 YEAR AGO: heartbroken after the end of a devastating relationship. My, how things can change in a year.

LAYER 11: FINISH THE SENTENCE:

I LOVE: Boy Wonder.
I FEEL: alert and bored
I HATE: working
I HIDE: If I said that, then it wouldn't stay hidden now would it? I have to keep some secrets.
I MISS: my flat stomach
I NEED: to study
I WANT: to win the lottery

Ahhh. . . romance

So yesterday was the two month anniversary for me and Boy Wonder. I know, I know. 2 months. . . whoopee. But it was still special. I'm surprised he's put up with my flunctuating hormones for the last month. We didn't really do anything special because it was only two months. But we did go see Last Kiss. It was a good movie. A little sad at parts and very touching and sweet. Lots of dysfunctional relationships, which may not be exactly what you want on an anniversary. But it made us feel better about our relationship, so it's all good. He did give me something though. He gave me a key to his place. Very big step. I guess that means he's really committed. But I knew that already.

My dear, sweet Boy Wonder has said so many wonderful, romantic things to me and to commerate our anniversary, I thought I would share them with you all. He actually suggested a blog entry of his great lines. (Yes, he does know that I have a blog, but he has respected my wishes that he not read it. In fact, he doesn't even want to read it since he knows blogs can be very personal. Whew, what a relief.)

1. My crotch is in love with you. (This was actually the first time he hinted that he might be in love with me. Even though it's about his crotch, I am still very fond of it.)

2. Baby, I would never steal your life vest. I'd at least wait until you were dead first.

3. I would love you even if you were in a wheelchair. . . as long as our crotches matched up and as long as your mouth still worked. (Now, THAT'S romantic.)

4. You have ruined porn for me. (I have no idea if he's feeding me a line on this one or not, but I'll just pretend it's true.)

5. I can't go to sleep without hearing your voice and I can't get off without sticking it in you.

Meeting the Family

Boy Wonder met the family yesterday. Oy and damn, damn, damn. My dad liked him. My grandmother loved him. My sister, however. . . now, I don't really give a damn whether she likes him or not. It's not like she has the best taste in people to begin with. She's not really discriminating about who she likes anyway. She likes everybody. That is, until you cross her. Then watch out.

Anyway, there was just a big scene yesterday after we had already had lunch. It was inadvertently started by me because I admitted to my father that on the way to the restaurant, Jenifer and her boyfriend had smoked with her 4 month old baby in the car. Not only that, but her boyfriend had basically said that was nobody else's business. This is a baby that spent the first week of her life in NICU because of problems with her lungs. This is also a baby that recently went to the doctor and was diagnosed with asthma. Jenifer was told by the doctor not to smoke around the baby and that it could make Abigail end up in the NICU again. Does that stop her? Absolutely not.

My dad refused to let Abigail ride in the same car back with them. And my sister went crazy. Boy Wonder and I were in the backseat and she was ranting and raving the entire ride home. It was freaking nuts. For her to go off like that in front of my boyfriend and hers was just totally inappropriate. But she doesn't realize that. Lucky for me, Boy Wonder does not scare easily. He did say that if I have any of THOSE genes in my body, then he will run like the wind. Haha.

Abigail is an adorable baby. She was quiet, too. She barely made a peep the entire day. She would start to scrunch up her face like she was going to cry a few times and then the second I put a bottle in her mouth, she was good. Connor (my nephew) was putting up a fight the entire dinner because he wanted to sit in my sister's lap. He was tired and sick and probably frustrated because my sister hardly ever spends any time with him. She's always dumping him off on other people. She was determined to eat without him in her lap, which meant he was screaming in his chair. I know we were disturbing other customers. I just think that if you are a mother, you have to deal with either eating with one hand or not eating until your child is satisfied. Her boyfriend offered to take him outside, but she refused. She didn't refuse when my dad offered though. I was about to yell at her. She needed to either sit him in her lap like she wanted or take him outside so he wasn't disturbing other customers. It's not like she cares about other people though. I was actually eating with Abigail in my arms. Granted, she stayed a lot more still than Connor, but I still managed to eat with one hand. She wasn't crying, but I had picked her up to give her a little attention. She needed it.

It was a crazy day, but at least Boy Wonder wasn't completely scared off. If he wasn't scared off by my sister, then we should be okay.

Milestones

It's been another crazy week here in my small, little world. I feel like I'm behind in my schoolwork already and it just started up again. I am trying really hard not to let my newfound personal life affect my studies and for the most part, I'm succeeding. I do have to remember that I have other goals in life besides making sure my relationship with Boy Wonder is kosher. I know. Surprising, isn't it? I'm taking a Marriage and Family Counseling course this time and it's actually kind of interesting. Honestly, if I weren't so set on counseling sex offenders, I might consider going into family counseling. Family counseling is a little more difficult, though. You don't just have one person's issues to consider. You may have two people or even five people to consider and all of them may have something different going on. That's a lot of balls in the air. Intense, but it does sound a little exciting as well. I guess counseling sex offenders can be both of those things, too.

Boy Wonder and I are in a really good place right now. I've still been emotional this week. I'm actually going off birth control and getting the IUD (which will cost me $500, thank you very much) next week, but that's another story. We hadn't been able to see each other since Saturday because of my work schedule and I also had plans with Kim this week (yes, Kim. . . I'll save that story for another blog entry). Maybe it's just my hormones, but I didn't really think he was missing me and I was totally missing him. We had a conversation last night in which he said he almost came to my place, but didn't because of gas and traffic, blah, blah, blah. Yet, he said he was committed to spending the rest of his life with me. I told him that there wasn't any way this was going to work if he didn't come to my place for reasons like that. I mean, we are going to be living apart for at least a year and a half. I did tell him that I wouldn't move in with him until I got married and I don't plan on getting married until after school. It would just be too much beforehand, I think. Anyway, it's hard not to take it personally, even though he was telling me that I shouldn't. He realized that he does need to meet me halfway on things. I had gotten out of Spanish class at 8:30 and was on my way home when we were having this conversation. Then, he said he would just come to my place. I told him that I wasn't mad and I didn't want him to feel forced to do it. But he was insistent, so he got to my place at 10:00. I think that was a good step in our relationship.

Boy Wonder is meeting some members of my family this weekend. I'm a little nervous. No boyfriend has ever met my family. I've never wanted them to because it's never been serious. So what's the point really if it's not going anywhere. He's meeting my dad and my grandmother, which really shouldn't be too bad. But he's also going to meet my sister. Ugh. Yeah, my sister's nuts. Plus, she may be bringing her 43 year old boyfriend with her. That's right. My 23 year old sister is dating a 43 year old man who doesn't have a job right now and has three kids, the oldest of which is 18. I am so looking forward to Sunday (insert sarcastic tone here). The reason that she is coming is because it's a birthday dinner for my dad. The only reason I'm kind of glad she's coming is because she's bringing her babies and they're freaking adorable. Boy Wonder also said that he would like to take me to Alabama over Thanksgiving to meet his family. If I can get out of work, that would be great. Apparently, he has never brought a girl home either so this is a big deal. We are so alike that it's scary.

Tonight, I am headed off to Seth's direction to celebrate HIS birthday. How dare these people have birthdays within days of each other? We're going to grab some dinner and maybe see The Wicker Man. That should be fun. After spending time with my gay boyfriend, I'll head off to see my straight one. Good times, good times on a Friday night.

Miss me much?

No, I haven't disappeared off the face of the planet. No, I haven't been killed or horribly disfigured in some freak staple gun accident. No, I wasn't kidnapped by aliens and used as their sex slave. I have just been really, really, really busy. Not very exciting, is it?

In reality, I haven't felt very much like blogging lately. I have been having a lot more migraines (due to a change in medication) and I have also had some depression issues (due to being on birth control pills). I swear, I have the most understanding boyfriend in the world. The last several weeks, I have been moody and angry and sad all at the same time. The smallest things have been setting me off. One minute I'm fine and the next minute (literally), I'm in tears. I told Boy Wonder that I haven't been this emotional or cried this much since I was sixteen. And all the migraines haven't been helping. Boy Wonder has been great, though. I'll get angry at him for no reason and I won't even tell him what the reason is. I'll just act moody and distant and he has no idea what the hell is wrong or what he's done. I told him last week though that I really think the birth control pills have been wreaking havoc with my body. He wants me off of them. He says he just wants me healthy and happy. I can't say that I blame him. Work isn't much better since I've been biting my grandmother's head off, too. I yelled at her a lot the other day. It was a bad day. Then this week, she bought me some new shirts and a new purse and she brought me lunch today. This other guy at work said I should treat her like crap more often if this is the kind of treatment that I can expect to get. I think her motive was to make me feel guilty. It's working.

I am on a new migraine medication and I think I'm finally on the right dosage. I have two doctor's appointments on Monday, one to get some other form of birth control and another with my neurologist to discuss how my new medication is going. I think I'm going to try this new migraine medication diet that my friend Laura is on. It involves getting rid of any potential dietary triggers for migraines, as well as going off all medications and going off any hormonal birth control method. I'm going to discuss this diet with my neurologist tomorrow and see what he says about going off my medication. I've already taken the first MAJOR step, which is to go off caffeine. Caffeine withdrawals were not fun. I was also irritable and snappy from those. But the cravings for caffeine aren't as bad, so that's good. Honestly, I've kind of been waiting until I finish all the processed food in my house first. Next grocery trip, I'll start buying all my unprocessed foods that I'm going to need. It's going to be a pain in the ass looking at all those ingredient labels.

I will get my health straightened out. It's just been a bit crazy. School started back this week, so I'm getting back in the swing of things with that. Lots of work to do and it's only the first week. I enjoy my Spanish class, as usual. I am in Beginning Level 3 and apparently, we are now in the level where we are not so much allowed to speak English. I was afraid I had forgotten most of what I learned in the first two levels, but it's like riding a bike. And I managed to understand most of what the teacher was saying. She tries not to speak super fast since she knows what level we're at and she cuts us a LITTLE slack when we slip up and speak English. But this professor is a little strict about it. I don't mind that. It'll force me to use the language.

So that is my life right now. Boy Wonder and I are doing fabulously. We are very happy, except for the fact that I have been "emotionally crazy" (his words, not mine, but they are accurate) these past few weeks. Oh, but I did forget to mention that I introduced him to my very best friend Seth last weekend. They got along great. Seth said he seemed like a nice guy and we seem good together. At one point, I left them alone together and Boy Wonder told him that I make him really happy. How sweet is that? Ahh. . . true love. Good times, good times.