Faking It

I have to admit that I don't enjoy my job quite the way I used to. I used to get a kick out of it. It is fun pretending to be someone else with different guys and to be sexy and turn them on. Of course, it's not me who is turning them on. I'm just playing a character. I'm not going to say my character's name because if any of my callers happen to read my blog, I would hate to destroy their fantasy that they are indeed talking to a real person.

I have been getting a lot of calls from guys who apparently don't care what I look like at all. I am giving a fake description, but who exactly is he thinking about if he doesn't even know what I look like? And if he's fantasizing about some other woman, what's the point in calling? But I shouldn't ask that because then I would be out of a job. The other day, I did have this caller who really couldn't tell that I was faking it. Granted, I fake it with every single call. But this one was taking so long and he wasn't even paying attention to whether I was moaning or not. Eventually, I actually did a fake moan on purpose. As in, I wasn't even trying to put excitement in my voice. I was basically just making noises to let him know I was still there. He did not know the difference. I'm pretty sure he was a virgin. I can tell these things.

I'm getting pretty good at being able to tell the virgins and the underage callers. Of course with the virgins, I never ask. It would embarrass them and they would just lie anyway. With underage callers, I just ask their birthday and keep a calculator handy. When I asked one caller what year he was born, he said, "I forgot." One caller told me he was 18 and when I asked what year he was born, he said, "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean 18. I meant to say 21." What am I? Stupid? I hang up on them as soon as possible when I know they are under 18. Stupid minors.

The end of the call is what I love the most. I never know what to expect. I really despise the guys who just hang up on me. Really, if there are men reading this who actually engage in phone sex, you should realize there is another person on the other end of the line and be respectful of that. I like the polite ones who say, "That was wonderful. Thank you." Then they hang up. I've even had some ask for my extension number so they can call me back (hey I am pretty good if I do say so myself). Then. . . there are the talkers. Some feel obligated to talk to you. It's almost like a boyfriend who wants to cuddle and you just want him to roll over and go to sleep. I really try not to reveal any personal information. And mainly, I talk about my fictional boyfriend. The talkers aren't bad because I do get paid the longer I keep them on the phone. But since they're only using me for my voice, it gets a little awkward. It's not like we have anything in common. Oh, the joys of the phone sex industry.