The Waiting Game
I have had two offers from two different guys in the last 24 hours to watch them on their webcam. One of them asked if I was horny and then immediately started begging me to watch him. The other one asked if I wanted to see him naked and then invited me to watch. That one has actually been trying to get me into bed for months. With this whole break from dating thing, I have been resisting him. I know he just wants sex though. He says he doesn't, but he never asks me an questions about myself, except for questions about sex. Gee, I'm sure he's just interested in my brain. With guys like this out there, is it any wonder I'm still single? But I'm feeling like maybe I'm turning into a prude for rejecting these guys. Seth said I'm lucky that guys want to show off on their webcams for me. Is that really luck? When all guys want from you is a good time, that's not really a good thing.
I have made an important decision regarding sex. I have decided that I'm going to remain abstinent until I fall in love and am with the guy that I plan to marry. Maybe that sounds weird considering the fact that I'm not religious. But I'm just tired of casual sex and of letting myself be used by the guys I go out with. I guess I am at the point in my life where I want something permanent. I used to be the type of person that didn't see anything wrong with a one-night stand or with having a "relationship" that was based entirely on sex. But I found myself actually considering meeting the guy who has been trying to get me into bed for months. I figured that if I had it in my head that it was based purely on sex, then maybe I could just use him until I meet someone more permanent. But the thought of that now makes my stomach turn. I guess that sounds prudish, but I'm not in the mood for that anymore. I had a strange dream last week. In the dream, I was having sex with someone. I'm not sure who it was, but I think it was someone I've had sex with before. I'm not really sure who though because the face was a little blurry. Anyway the guy and I are having sex and after he's done, he just gets up and says, "Thank you" and walks away. I think the dream is a sign that I'm tired of being used. As much as I may like sex (and believe me, I do), I think it's best that I wait. A little prudish and old-fashioned maybe. . . but still a good idea.
I have made an important decision regarding sex. I have decided that I'm going to remain abstinent until I fall in love and am with the guy that I plan to marry. Maybe that sounds weird considering the fact that I'm not religious. But I'm just tired of casual sex and of letting myself be used by the guys I go out with. I guess I am at the point in my life where I want something permanent. I used to be the type of person that didn't see anything wrong with a one-night stand or with having a "relationship" that was based entirely on sex. But I found myself actually considering meeting the guy who has been trying to get me into bed for months. I figured that if I had it in my head that it was based purely on sex, then maybe I could just use him until I meet someone more permanent. But the thought of that now makes my stomach turn. I guess that sounds prudish, but I'm not in the mood for that anymore. I had a strange dream last week. In the dream, I was having sex with someone. I'm not sure who it was, but I think it was someone I've had sex with before. I'm not really sure who though because the face was a little blurry. Anyway the guy and I are having sex and after he's done, he just gets up and says, "Thank you" and walks away. I think the dream is a sign that I'm tired of being used. As much as I may like sex (and believe me, I do), I think it's best that I wait. A little prudish and old-fashioned maybe. . . but still a good idea.
1 Comments:
Years ago I used to have a bonk buddy, you know, a male friend who I spent time with just for sex. That's what I wanted at the time, I didn't want a relationship but I wanted the physical side of it. It didn't take me long to notice, that the time I enjoyed the most with him, was always after the sex, while we were cuddled up talking.
I realised then, that it wasn't the sex I missed, it was the closeness and the intimacy. He made me feel special by not leaping out of bed and running out the door straight after I guess.
I've lots more I could say, but I'm hungry, it's breakfast time, and I would end up filling your comment box with a post if I don't stop now lol
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